What a fucking waste of an outfit
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
