Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize