I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
