Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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