i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
