Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
He keeps bees of course he's weird
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
