I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
you will always have a special place in my vag
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
