Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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