Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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