You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
