I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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