so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
