i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
