Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
