I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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