i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
