I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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