So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
We got so high we made milksteak
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
