I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
We were destined to go to rehab together
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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