when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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