I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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