I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
