He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
