You don't have asthma, your pregnant
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize