1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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