Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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