Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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