It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
