Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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