i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
