she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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