First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
