I think i sorta joined a cult last night
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
