I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
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