your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
The ass gains better be worth it
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