At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize