Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
