Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
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