I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
