We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize