He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
