Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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