i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
