OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize