Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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