i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
