I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
