just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize