he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
