i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize