So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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